It's Not News

So it's been a dogs age since I've done anything in the way of updates. I had to fight with blogspot a little just to get my account back up and running (password related issues) but thankfully that's been solved.

I'm not really sure what to say at this point, other than I believe I'll be posting more and hopefully on a somewhat regular basis. I doubt I have readers but I don't particularly care all that much. This space is more of a dumping ground for my brain slush. All those random thoughts and day dreams that slosh around in my head, awash with bits of song lyrics and what not.

I've been doing a little painting. Completed a few small pieces as gifts in the last few months as well as stripped and hand painted a simple longboard. It feels good to be "creating" again and I have a small stack of canvas' waiting to be used. I haven't been doing much in the way of creative writing but I have been doing some interesting reading. Having just finished Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, I've now started in on Ulysses.

Ulysses scares the shit out of me.

That gets its own line.

There's so many editions and despite their claims, none are a "definitive text" as the original manuscript never really existed. Joyce would 'complete' the manuscript, send it off for possible publication, and continue to tinker with it afterwords. He would later send off these newer versions to other potential publishers and so on. As a result, even picking up a copy that I was happy with seemed daunting. I have the Penguin student edition, and it's a fucking bible in length. I'm excited to read it, but scared to start and not finish.

My girlfriend (the 'new' one) pointed out that I'm often scared to just DO things, despite things usually turning out pretty well for me. She said she thought it was because I got hung up on the possibility of failure, and that this inhibited me from even starting things that I wanted to do. She has a point with this, it's somewhat inarguable logic. I get fearful of failure and never begin. Thereby automatically failing. It's a somewhat sobering and depressing notion.

I didn't always used to feel this way, and I have no MAJOR instances in my life where I have failed, so I'm not sure where the insecurity spawns from. But I suppose knowing it about myself, I can try and combat it with hopefully greater ease and success.

Not much more to say for now. I think that I'm going to dig up some of my writing experiments and tinker with them a little, or perhaps just move onto something new. My last semester at school taught me that I can do some pretty damn good writing when inclined to try. I took a beating in late penalties, but the papers themselves were decent, and most of them written either the night or the day before handing them in.

Hopefully my next update will include something creative for reader consumption.

If the traditional sign off still holds any water, I'm not quite sure. But for posterity sake...

Thank you, Faithful Few.
Wouldn't be here without you.